


Lovesick

by we_are_all_irrelivant



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Blow Jobs, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Trans Kurapika, Trans Male Character, Trans Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, kurapika: (shows up unannounced at leorios door for the first time in months), leorio: (frantically sloughing off his pants) yfdfgdfdggsabsvavshdasggfyfgfj, this is just porn . that is all, trans sex!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-16
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-02 12:03:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18810529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/we_are_all_irrelivant/pseuds/we_are_all_irrelivant
Summary: love·sick(adj.): languishing with love





	Lovesick

**Author's Note:**

> hi all.. i like hunter x hunter now .. that is all
> 
> note: im a trans mlm myself and i use "feminine" terms fr kurapikas genitalia ! :o)

Three knocks. Nothing more, nothing less. Three knocks, and then he would wait.

 

It didn’t matter how he had found where Leorio was living. Kurapika’s work took him all over the continent—all over the world, sometimes—and Leorio himself sometimes moved, for internships, residencies, studies in the field, but Kurapika would always find his way back. He could always find his way back to him.

 

Three knocks, and Leorio knew. He couldn’t quite recall why they had settled on this as Kurapika’s code, his way of announcing he was back; his way of announcing to him that he had decided to let him in, at least for the day, at least for a night. But it was his. Three knocks and nothing more. Leorio’s heart wrung and his chest burned. Butterflies jostled within him and he felt like a child, sick with excitement when given the object of its fascination.

 

Three knocks, and Kurapika waited. He was not a patient man, but yet he waited for him, without even the assurance that he was home. He didn’t _need_ to. He no longer did what he strictly needed to these days, only what he wanted. He did things for himself, selfishly. And so he waited, head cocked gently to the side, to feel gravity tug on his ruby earring.

 

If Leorio had been in his right mind, he would’ve scorned himself for how quickly he dropped his notebook and stumbled to his feet. He would’ve mocked how hurriedly he shuffled his studying materials into a messy pile and how hard he had to work to keep himself from running to the door. He would’ve spat vile, self-deprecating things at himself for how enraptured he had let himself become, with someone so cold and difficult. He would’ve questioned why he so deeply yearned for someone who had so easily ignored him for months on end, who had so easily pushed away him and the boys and anyone else who couldn’t immediately help him destroy himself, anyone who cared enough to try to help him heal. If he were in his right mind, he wouldn’t have fumbled so much with the locks on his door.

 

Kurapika looked worn. Insomnia and too much caffeine and grief were clear in the lines under his eyes and the neutral twist of his mouth. His eyes were a clear, powerful piercing gray, like the sky before a morning rain. They held rigid ruthlessness that would have made a sane man shiver. Within himself, Leorio’s heart warmed to think he had come to see him without his contacts. There was already enough in him that withheld. The wall behind now was thin enough for him to see his eyes soften—imperceptibly, just a bit—as his gaze slid slowly up his body, settling on his own.

 

Blood coursed hotly around his body. “Hi,” Leorio said dumbly. His tongue felt thick in his mouth. He swallowed too hard.

 

“Hello.” Kurapika’s voice was level and beautiful. Leorio felt so small before him. “I was in town. I thought I’d stop by. It’s been a while.”

 

Leorio swallowed the lie without a thought. “I w—”

 

Kurapika’s gaze fell, past him into his apartment, and Leorio’s mouth shut obediently. He spared a single glance as he stepped forward, wordlessly prompting him to step to the side so he could cross the threshold. Leorio’s gaze followed him, hand silently finding the knob and shutting the door behind them. Leorio was trudging through his mind at a snail’s pace, breathing thickly, trying to dredge up the right words to say to someone who hadn’t responded to any of his calls in months, when Kurapika turned around, stepping closer to him and looking up at him. His eyes were softer now, glowing a blushing pink around the edges. Leorio sucked in a short, hot breath, and then Kurapika was on his tiptoes, arms reaching to wrap around his neck, pulling his shoulders down so that his lips could meet his, warm and dry and chapped and electrifying.

 

Leorio bent himself obediently, arms wrapping around Kurapika’s waist, leaning too desperately into the kiss himself, eyes screwed shut and heart quivering like a hummingbird. Kurapika’s suit—he looked so good in it, Leorio thought; so dapper, so cold—was crisp and rough beneath his hands. He could feel the heat of his back through the stiff fabric, and his fingers curled against him, clutching for his warmth. His breath came in short, shallow huffs through his nose, too focused on the taste and the smell and the presence of Kurapika to breathe. His lips were warm and smooth and familiar, and it ran a current of excited electricity through him. He felt the firm heat of Kurapika’s tongue press against his lips, slipping easily and hungrily into his mouth. Leorio groaned, gripping the smaller man tighter. He pulled back after a moment, straightened up just enough that Kurapika couldn’t yet recapture his lips.

 

“I missed you,” he mumbled, cheeks flushed pink and chest full of fireworks.

 

“Is that so?” Kurapika surged upwards, greedily. Leorio mirrored him, pulling back to keep his mouth just out of reach. Something foolish in him wanted to keep speaking.

 

“A lot.”

 

“Hmm.” Kurapika brought a hand up to work loose the knot of his tie, delicate fingers twisting like birds to undo a few of the buttons. His throat was smooth, flushed pink, the sharp contour of his muscles and tendons strong and warm. “If you’ve missed me so badly, why are you talking instead of kissing me?”

 

Leorio licked his lips. Kurapika slipped his tie up and over his head. He’d unbuttoned his shirt enough to show the rigid line of his collar bones, the very beginning of the rising slope of his chest. When he kissed him, he felt so much warmer, like a morsel of magma. Leorio wrapped his arms around him, tightly, needily, kissing him with all he had, like he was a rare and precious thing. Kurapika let him. He let him cling to him, enveloping and squeezing him in his seeping heat; let him gently push his jacket off, like he might touch him too roughly otherwise, like he was a creature made of glass; let him contemplate carrying him to the bedroom for a moment.

 

Kurapika broke them apart. He took Leorio’s hand—Leorio could feel something surge through himself then—and began leading him further into the apartment.

 

“It’s on the right,” Leorio said thickly. His blood stirred fervently within him, like the churning of ocean currents. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, feel it in his temples, in the pit of heat growing low in his belly. Leorio was a patient man, but it had been too long. Too long since a phone call, since a photo, an email, a letter, anything at all; anything to tell him that he was safe, that he was alive, that he loved him. Not to mention his memories of their last evening together were getting dull: he remembered Kurapika’s breath shivering in his ear, the taste of his skin, the grip of his fingers in his hair, but it was muted and gray when he tried to recall it. He had tried to satisfy himself with crumbs for too long. He was hungry.

 

Kurapika’s hands were light and cool on Leorio’s stomach. Leorio watched him tug his shirt up easily, smoothing his fingers over the flat plane of his belly. His eyes glowed a dusty rose as he watched Leorio pull his shirt the rest of the way off. His gaze drew Leorio in for another kiss, deep and heady and wanting. He could feel the heat radiating from Kurapika’s chest—he had unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way—and his heart galloping like a beast in his own.

 

Kurapika walked them several steps backward, until Leorio could lay him back onto the bed and hover above him. The blond man’s arms immediately found themselves around Leorio’s neck, pulling him back in for another kiss, tugging gently, urging him to bear more of his weight atop him. Leorio kissed him desperately, hands on either side of Kurapika’s body, blood trembling through him so hard it was a struggle to keep himself from letting his arms buckle and crushing him. He drank of him ravenously, overwhelmed with his taste, his smell, his heat. Leorio groaned softly in his throat, and pulled back on his own, shifting his mouth to press hot, wet kisses along Kurapika’s cheek. His lips found the slender curve of Kurapika’s neck, pursing lightly against his tender skin. He felt him tense immediately beneath him, hand coming to grip Leorio’s bicep, squeezing harder as Leorio nipped and sucked a beautiful blushing bruise into his skin. He craned his head back and to the side, eyes shut and breathing slowly.

 

“I missed you,” Leorio mumbled against his throat, voice purring against the skin and the bruise and drawing a slow shiver through Kurapika’s body. “So much.” He punctuated his words with kisses down the crook of his neck, reaching to peel his shirt the rest of the way off. “So, so much.”

 

Kurapika hummed, arms tightening around Leorio’s neck as he bit another mark into the curve where his neck met his shoulder. His heart thudded in his chest, blood churning and coursing immediately to the thick swell of heat collecting low in his belly. His cheeks glowed. Kurapika didn’t like to think of himself as a lightweight, but what Leorio lacked in class he made up for with that tongue of his. In another life, he imagined Leorio might tease him every time his kissing of his neck got him wet.

 

Kurapika placed a hand on Leorio’s cheek, drawing his attention back to his face and drawing his lips back to his own. Kurapika lapped hungrily at him, devouring his heat and his giddy energy, pouring from him like a faucet. As they kissed, he felt Leorio shift, and then his strong, soft hands were exploring him, smoothing down his sides, petting and gripping hot, pale flesh. His hands settled at his hips for a moment, teasing at the waist of his pants before sliding back up. One hand came to cup his breast, easily enveloping it in his rough palm, grasping and kneading gently. Leorio made a sound in his throat before he pulled away, pressing drunken kisses down his chest until he reached his nipple. He took the hardened nub into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and sucking on it gently. Kurapika twitched, eyes falling shut, teeth worrying at the skin of his bottom lip. He let out a tight, shivering breath as Leorio continued, his other hand coming up to squeeze his other breast. He pinched his nipple between his thumb and forefinger, pressing his face into the soft warmth of Kurapika’s chest when he felt his lungs stutter and his breath hitch.

 

Leorio hummed, pleased, sucking thoughtfully at his nipple. Between his own legs he could feel how hard he was, cock straining and leaking in his underwear. He was sure Kurapika could feel it, pressed against his belly as he was. He thought of Kurapika, how wet he must have been with all he was doing to him, and how long it had been since they’d seen each other; how hot and pink his flesh must have been between his own legs; how swollen and sensitive his clit must have been (Leorio loved how much it grew when he got hard). A needing shiver ran through him then. As he worked his way back up the blond man’s chest, he groaned against Kurapika’s throat, eyes fluttered shut, fantasizing. His hands slid hungrily down Kurapika’s body, once again finding the waist of his pants. His fingers found the clasp of his belt and paused, petting and feeling the stiff, expensive leather. A question.

 

Kurapika nodded breathlessly. Leorio undid his belt hurriedly, fingers tripping over themselves. He slid his hand carefully into Kurapika’s dress pants, fingers reaching to press against the wet heat between his legs. A rushing of blood around his body made him lightheaded when his fingers found the stiff shape of his engorged clit, pushing against his underwear. Kurapika exhaled half of a gasp as Leorio pressed his hand against his cunt, kneading and rubbing his clit in small, careful circles.

 

“You’re so…” Leorio mumbled, face pressed into Kurapika’s neck. He couldn’t finish the sentence. He moaned, nuzzling into the firm bend of his neck.

 

Kurapika squeezed him tighter, eyes screwed shut, hips twitching to thrust into his touch. His teeth sunk into his lower lip, a weak, helpless moan rising from low in his belly. The more he touched him—when Leorio spread his fingers on either side of his clit and used them to jerk him off, when he pressed his fingertips to the hot, damp strip of fabric a few centimeters lower—the closer it got to escaping his dry lips. When Leorio shifted to slide his hand into his underwear, brushing through the cropping of thick blond hair at his crotch, skin finally touching hot, begging skin, careful fingers finding his hood to drag it back and stroke sweetly at his swollen clit, the noise escaped him, shivering and twisting as it ran easily from his mouth into the heated air between them. Leorio hummed, a beast awaiting its dinner.

 

“More,” Kurapika gasped, face drawn and pressed against the side of Leorio’s head, nose crushed against his temple.

 

“Like this?” Leorio gave his clit a few more rubs and then move his hand down further, fingers teasing at the wet crease of his slit. He slipped between his lips easily, gingerly spreading him open with two fingers. When he bottomed out, palm of his hand resting against his crotch, he began thrusting carefully, hooking his fingers up with each pull, the way he knew Kurapika liked.

 

Kurapika shivered, panting hotly against Leorio, throwing his legs apart to give him more room. A needy whimper escaped him as he rocked with the motion of Leorio’s fingers. He couldn’t recall ever being so sensitive or reactive before, coming apart so easily at the seams. It made him want to blush when he moaned, when his breath came out in tight huffs as Leorio stuffed a third finger in him and used all three to work at that spot inside of him that always made his thighs tremble, when he whined as Leorio licked and then nipped at his throat, crushing capillaries and planting lovebites that blossomed like roses. He knew that behind his eyelids, his eyes were blazing red, rich crimson churning and rolling within his irises.

 

“ _Fuck_ ,” Leorio hissed, pumping his fingers into Kurapika faster, frenzied heat rolling in his belly. It was all he could do to keep himself from grinding against Kurapika’s thigh, or snaking a hand between them to get himself off. It was the heat of him, the feel of him around his fingers, the way he clenched around them every time he twitched his hips, the filthy sound of his wetness as he thrust into him, the way he moved beneath him and clung to him for dear life. It was a heady, intoxicating combination, that made him want to bury his face into his neck and keep going just like this until he tensed beneath him in orgasm. It was his surprise, then, when Kurapika shifted, reaching down to stop the motion of his hand and sitting the two of them up. He was helpless, drunk on love as Kurapika slipped his pants and underwear the rest of the way off and pushed him into a recline with a single hand on his pink chest. He watched, dazed, as he reached for the band of his sweatpants, pulling it down to let his leaking cock spring free.

 

A moment of lucidity passed through him. “You don’t h—”

 

“I want to,” Kurapika said simply, eyes and cheeks glowing red as he gave Leorio a slow, careful stroke up his member, fingers toying with the head as he spoke. “I’m not heartless.”

 

Leorio swallowed thickly, lip trembling from where it was trapped between his teeth. He watched Kurapika consider his dick carefully, dragging his thumb through the precum beading at the tip. He shifted, laying down and stretching out, before he licked a broad stripe up and back down Leorio’s length, pressing his lips to the base and stroking him lightly. Leorio closed his eyes, hands gripping the sheets. He felt Kurapika grasp his balls, rolling them in his hand, and then the soft heat of his mouth enveloping him. Leorio let out a stuttering breath.

 

“F-fuck!” he gasped under his breath. “God, ‘Pika, I…”

 

Kurapika hummed a gentle reassure, swirling his tongue around the head of his cock. He took more of him into his mouth, breathing slowly through his nose, stroking with one hand what he couldn’t fit. He began to bob his head in time with his stroking, lips clasped tightly around his dick, tongue lapping at whatever it could reach. He could feel the twitching Leorio’s thighs and hips on either side of him, whenever his cock suddenly pushed against the back of his throat or the hot, dry skin of his inner thigh brushed against his cheek. It satisfied some greedy part of him, seeing how easily he could pull Leorio to pieces, how enthralled he became with his lips and his hands and his holes, how weak someone who dwarfed him so much could become. It sent a rush straight to his crotch and he groaned around him, urging himself forward to take even more of his cock into his mouth. His throat spasmed and he felt his stomach tighten as he gagged softly. He ignored it, blinking away the tears that welled in the corners of his eyes, focusing instead on the iron grip Leorio now had on his hair, his hand having just been petting him in silent praise.

 

Leorio’s breath came in fast, shallow huffs. He could feel how close he was, and his heart leapt in his chest. He tightened his hand in Kurapika’s hair, biting at his lip to distract himself. Kurapika pulled back slowly, pursing his lips against the head of his cock as he took it from his mouth. He began stroking him, slowly, absentmindedly, and the heat of him drew up and up his body, until Leorio could feel him pressed against him, hot breath ghosting across his cheek. With his free hand, Kurapika drew his attention to him, pressing forward to kiss him deeply. Leorio kissed back obediently, groaning into his mouth with restless need.

 

“I want to fuck you,” he murmured, voice hushed and cracked.

 

“Where do you keep your condoms?”

 

“Bottom drawer.”

 

Leorio let himself fall back as Kurapika moved, sorely missing his warmth. He heard the sound of the drawer sliding open, the crinkle of foil as he tore open a wrapper, the click of a bottle of lube opening. He twitched once when he felt Kurapika’s hands on him, rolling the condom onto him.

 

“Do y—”

 

“I’ve got it.”

 

Leorio kept his eyes trained on the ceiling. He wasn’t sure why. He felt the weight of the smaller man on his belly as he leaned onto him, and then the warmth of his cunt, hips canted back so he could rock back teasingly against him. Leorio moaned, eyes falling shut and hands grasping for Kurapika. He shifted, lifting himself so he could press Leorio’s cock to his entrance, and lowered himself until he bottomed out, clit flush against Leorio’s pubes. The sudden heat surrounding him was overwhelming and Leorio gripped his hips hard enough to turn his knuckles white.

 

“Fuck… God, you’re so…” Leorio breathed, head swimming as he fought through the haze of pleasure so he could enjoy this moment. “You feel so good.”

 

Kurapika only nodded, hands flat against Leorio’s chest, lip caught between his teeth. The fullness, the weight, the depth, the stretch—he had missed it more sorely than he ever knew; his fingers, no matter how many or how deep he stuffed them inside himself, never compared, and he had never had it in him to find unfamiliar, disposable men to fuck, not when it was _Leorio’s_ hands and mouth and cock that he found himself yearning for. He knew he should’ve hated that he had to do this. If he were a wiser man, he would have. He should’ve hated these needs of his, this immutable hunger that came bubbling up from some deep, carnal place within him, the way he craved release; it was a distraction from his goal, nothing more. But he couldn’t bring himself to stop. He couldn’t bring himself to hate Leorio and what they did together, or the touch he found himself craving, the smell of his sweat and the heat of his mouth he found himself thinking of when he tried to satisfy these urges on his own. It was too strong a desire—a _need_ —to ignore. He shivered too easily under Leorio’s touch and melted too quickly from his kisses and became too relaxed in his arms for him to ignore him forever. As long as he had ghosted him now was as long as he knew he could ever go. He had let him get too close; they had let each other see too much of their souls for him to let him go now.

 

Kurapika shifted, rolling his hips back, grinding down on Leorio’s cock. Leorio moaned helplessly, hands denting the flesh of his hips hard enough to bruise. Kurapika let out a long, trembling breath as he began to pick himself up and drop back down, fucking himself slowly. The wet, filthy slap of skin against skin filled the room, mingling with their moans and pants; an intimate symphony of hot, shared breath and hungry hands played just for them. Kurapika blushed down his chest, splotches of mottled red and pink stretching across his collarbone. As he bounced, his long blond hair flew, hanging wildly in his face when his knees got tired and he resorted to desperate grinding, face turned down in concentration. It was a deliciously far cry from the neat, immaculate way it had been brushed when he saw him at the door. His earring swung from his earlobe, catching the light every so often and throwing bright ruby glints across the room, into Leorio’s hungry eyes.

 

Leorio was in bliss, eyes half lidded and lolled back in ecstasy, drinking in greedily Kurapika’s grunts and whimpers, his weight on top of him, the heat of being buried inside him. But something within him, something selfish and feral and ravenous, wanted more. He wanted to see Kurapika beneath him again, writhing and clinging to him, too pleasured to speak. He wanted him to see, to hear, to _feel_ how badly he had missed him and his body.

 

Kurapika sat heavily on Leorio’s cock, shivering as he bottomed out and the head of his cock drove deep inside him. He was panting, sweat beading out on his forehead and his chest. His muscles burned. He was close, and the knot of heat growing in his belly was becoming unbearable. He was tired enough, drunk enough on desperation, that when Leorio shifted to lay him out on the bed, he let him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders as soon as he was within reach. He moaned, openly, wantonly, when Leorio pressed inside of him, eyebrows knitting together in bliss.

 

“ _Fuck_ ,” Kurapika whimpered, panting hotly against Leorio’s neck. “Please… Please…”

 

Leorio nodded, pressing dry, gentle kisses to his cheek as he began to thrust. He started off slow and timid as best as he could manage, until the tightening of Kurapika’s arms around his neck and his own impatience got the better of him, and then he was grasping Kurapika in his arms like he was some precious thing that might otherwise disappear forever, the knocking of the headboard against the wall keeping time with his thrusts. Kurapika cried out, knuckles white as they gripped Leorio’s hair, chest heaving and heart churning wildly, greedily as Leorio fucked him with all the yearning and love and anger he had in him. He missed this. He missed him. He hated the way he ignored him so easily. He loved that he still thought of him, at least from time to time. He loved him. He loved him. The words bubbled up his throat like a rising wave, but he bit them back, pressing an open mouthed kiss to Kurapika’s neck and lapping at his skin instead.

 

Kurapika moaned low, breathlessly. The rolling knot of heat in his belly grew and tightened, tensing his muscles and hastening his breath. He rocked his hips messily in time with Leorio, searching for friction against his clit. He squeezed Leorio tighter in his arms, gripped his hair tighter, as if he might suddenly disappear from him. He shut his eyes tightly, panting hotly against Leorio’s skin. The heat rose slowly in him, tugging at the edges of him, before it surged and swelled within him, drawing a loud, helpless, trembling moan from his mouth as it crashed like a wave, heavy heat and electricity and fiery ecstacy rushing through him, wrenching every nerve, every muscle, every cell in its grip, pushing every coherent thought from his mind, blinding him with hot, melting, overwhelming pleasure. Kurapika shook in Leorio’s arms as he came, breath coming in shallow, shivering pants, hips rocking desperately against him as steadily ebbing waves of pleasure rattled through him.

 

Leorio groaned tightly when he felt Kurapika spasm around him, clenching around his cock in steady waves as his orgasm tore through him. His rhythm collapsed and he began to fuck into him frantically, desperately, eyes shut and mouth agape, chasing his orgasm with wild fury so that when it barreled into him, it pushed a tight cry from his lips. His mouth tightened against the skin of Kurapika’s neck, a low moan rumbling in his throat. He gave a few more stiff, jerky thrusts as he rode out his orgasm, drinking in the way Kurapika writhed and whined tiredly as he did. As he came down, he pulled out of Kurapika and rolled to the side, head still fuzzy and ears stuffed with cotton.

 

“Fuck,” Leorio panted, pushing a weak hand through his damp hair. He peeled the condom off his steadily softening dick and tied it off, tossing it in the trash can beside his night stand. He let his eyes fall shut, heart still pounding dully in his chest. A few moments of stillness, air churning slowly as they caught their breath. Leorio felt Kurapika shift beside him, and then the warmth of his head resting on his chest. Leorio automatically put an arm around him, wide hand resting against his shoulder.

 

Kurapika hummed slowly, mouth pressed to his skin. He shifted closer to him, missing the warmth and weight of him on top of him. He craned his head up, eyes glowing cerise, cheeks still flushed and hot. Leorio’s gaze caught his, warm and clouded by the vestiges of his orgasm.

 

“Good?” Leorio asked, almost timidly.

 

Kurapika nodded. “Very.”

 

Leorio nodded himself, closing his eyes. He inhaled, chest swelling slowly. “I missed you.” It came out like a sigh.

“I could tell.”

 

Leorio opened his eyes again, staring at the shadows of the mottled ceiling. “How much longer are you going to be in town?”

 

Kurapika was quiet. He brought his hand up to rest it on Leorio’s belly. “A few more days, probably. I’m between hunts right now. But I’m meeting some colleagues in Yorknew in a few weeks.” He was quiet for a moment. “They might… they might need me to come sooner,” he said, softer.

 

There was so much Leorio wanted to say then. He wanted to ask if they could stop dancing around the truth with euphemisms and encrypted words. He wanted to ask for more time, more evenings; days, even, where they could go out together and eat something or do something or visit the boys maybe. He wanted to ask for time that wasn’t frantic and infatuated and fleeting. He wanted to beg him for more. He wanted to beg him to stay safe so that he didn’t have to die in the middle of a trafficking deal or in a back alley where no one knew enough about him to know to tell Leorio that he was gone. He wanted to tell him he loved him. He wanted to ask if he loved him back.

 

“I hope they don’t,” Leorio said, softly, half to himself.

 

“They’re competent people,” Kurapika said simply. Slowly, he pressed closer to Leorio, turning his face to press a kiss to his chest.


End file.
